On the book I'm writing I've now firmly finished the first third of the book and am heading to the beginning of the middle. This book has been a bit of a challenge as mentioned before. There are quite a few jumps in time and a lot of characters to balance. It has also just been exceptionally fun and I've loved writing a character who starts as a child and at this point is now an adult.
Now, I'm going to get a little personal. This week I've struggled a bit with anxiety. I have general anxiety that just a couple of years ago led to daily panic attacks and a constant feeling of unease that made me nauseous. I'm extremely grateful because this week was the first time I had felt that constant unease for a while. The reason I bring that up is because I've tried to incorporate those feelings of anxiety into a few characters I've written.
There was a time in my life that someone close to me said that it was unrealistic to write a character with anxiety as a warrior or fighter. It hurt at the time because despite my anxiety I feel as if there have been things in my life I have loved enough or felt strong enough about to fight for them anyway. Having anxiety is difficult. I can't say I know what it's like to feel normal or to not be afraid of certain things all the time, but at the same time, I'm grateful for it. I feel as if it has helped me be more understanding and forgiving of people, especially when they're afraid.
I desperately want to make characters who face similar problems, who are told they can't do or be someone because of something about them but they fight all the harder because their convictions are greater than the assumptions strangers, friends, and family make about them. I believe it's vital that we purge these biases that we feel about any group or individual person from our lives. We all have them. I'm sure I have them.
Whether it's race, gender, religion, mental illness, we should strive for a world where everyone feels accepted. If someone is struggling we should make it easier for them to recover rather than harder whether we believe they will feel grateful or not. There have been times in my life I have felt so low and so full of fear that it felt larger than myself, as if I would be consumed by it. Angels in my life, friends, family, sometimes strangers, have pulled me out again and again, reminding me that in this world we are not alone. They've reminded me that simple words and actions can make a tremendous difference in an individual's life.
We may not be dragons, big mythical creatures who awe and inspire various cultures at various times. But we can awe and inspire the world in so many ways. We can make others feel happy, safe, and loved and the world needs a lot more of that.
Thank you for reading this article. What are some themes you wish you saw more in books? What differences have people made in your life?
Keep dreaming and daydreaming of all the wonderful worlds in your head.